How To Love Others Well During The Holidays
The Holidays are a time of love and joy. So why do we feel so stressed? Today, let’s take one big stressor off the table. In this post, find smart and godly ways to love others during the holidays.
The holidays are here, bringing with them the familiar hustle and bustle, the excitement of gathering with family and friends, and, of course, an endless to-do list. With all the celebrations and preparations, it’s easy to feel stretched thin, leaving us less patient, less kind, and sometimes, less loving. This season, a time meant for joy, gratitude, and peace, can somehow become the very opposite. How does this sacred, special time get turned around, often leaving us feeling stressed and worn and often bringing out the worst in us?
Holiday Stress
Do you ever feel more stressed than blessed during the holiday season? I think we all do at times. Unfortunately, most of us are not going to get rid of our holiday stressors—unless we’re considering a solo getaway for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
There are countless little things that test our patience this time of year, but today, I want to talk about just one: people. The people we love and gather with can sometimes bring a bit of holiday angst despite all our best intentions.
While we can’t control what others say or do, we can control our own reactions and how we choose to interact. Setting up realistic expectations is key! No one, and no holiday, is perfect. Instead of striving for perfection, let’s focus on connection—the kind that lets us love more openly, build stronger relationships, and create memories that last a lifetime.
Fill Your Tank So You Can Love Others During The Holidays
There are a few things we can do to safeguard our spiritual tank and make sure it is topped off, helping us start each day with a heart that’s ready to be kind and loving.
Start Each Morning
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. Phil 4:8 and 9
Let’s fill our hearts and minds with God’s most honorable, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, worthy of praise words and put them into action!
Pray Throughout The Day
The effective prayer of a righteous man prevails much. James 5:16
Throughout the day, take a few moments to pray over whatever situations come your way. Ask God to help you love others well and to fill you with His peace and joy. Pray for everyone you’ll be in contact with, asking for God’s blessings and goodness in their lives. Let prayer be woven into each day!
Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask and you will receive so that your joy may be full. John 16:24
Ask for what you need to love others in Jesus’ name. He has all authority and power, and it’s God’s will for you to reflect His love more and more.
Be On Guard
Our mouths can really get us into trouble! But what we say is really a heart matter. A matter of what fills our mind and intellect.
Remember that whatever fills our hearts will eventually come out in our words! It’s worth taking time to examine what’s in our hearts. Holding onto grudges or nursing past hurts can poison our feelings toward others. Instead, let’s ask God to forgive our unforgiveness and to heal any hurt. Let bitterness die right there!
Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the doors of my lips. Ps 141:3
Use your filter! It’s surprising how quickly we say things we might later regret. Saying whatever comes to mind is often a sign of emotional immaturity or lack of self-control. True maturity is holding back from words that might make us feel better momentarily but cause hurt, worsen a situation, and bring regret later.
If we want to love others well during the holidays, let’s watch what bubbles up from our hearts and flows from our lips.
Back Away From An Argument
Be completely humble, and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Eph 4:2
The holidays often bring out differences in opinions, but we don’t have to let pride or frustration pull us into arguments. True love shows itself in our willingness to listen and let go. Love is, after all, love despite disagreements and imperfections. Remember the wisdom of turning the other cheek when tension rises, just as Jesus taught us.
Those who trouble their family will inherit the wind. The fool will be servant to the wise. Pro 11:29
A Prayer For You
I pray that your holiday season is blessed with God’s most wonderful blessings and that the Author of Christmas, Jesus our Lord, fills you with true love, peace, and great joy!
It’s important to love others during holidays. It will turn this special time of year into special memories.
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Very good message and one we need to practice throughout the stressful holiday season. Thank you, Yvonne.
Wise advice on all counts!
Oh how I needed this. I have been struggling and my morning Bible reading has not been what it should be. God has been showing me things in His word, but your reminders are so helpful. Thank you so much Yvonne. God Bless you always.
This is the most useful of your postings. You share the true meaning of the holidays. Let us think about God in all we do.
Smiles and thank you for your wisdom.
I was just emailing my sister this past week and telling her that I need to relax and not let myself get stressed over our Thanksgiving meal and the cooking. I plan things out way beforehand, do a lot of prep work the day before, and it always turns out OK. I get anxious when someone (particularly my daughter) gets in my way in the kitchen. I need to just relax and enjoy those I love being around me. Thank you for this reminder, and this message!
Karen, Thanks so much for your honesty. I’m not with my daughters this Thanksgiving. I’d give anything if they would be in my way!
Thank -you for the best advise ever! I will take this to heart! Truly Thankful.
Beautifully said! Thank you so much for this wonderful reminder. So glad I found you! Blessings!
Welcome to the StoneGable family Merrijane
Thank you, Yvonne, for these timely words of wisdom. People often comment on how ‘calm’ I am- and I try to let them know that without His “peace that surpasses all understanding” I would struggle! The reminder to stay in God’s word and prayer is so important.
I’m thankful for the joy and wisdom your blog brings!
I am taking this to heart. thank you.
Thank-You!!! I need to read this post every day between now and New Years, maybe then I will have some of it down. His word is truly treasure, better than silver or gold.
Oh what a wonderful way to kindly remind us of LOVE in a Godly way. My Thanksgiving and all Holidays are bitter sweet — I praise God for the special times but always I am without my son/daughter in-law and the grandchildren — so thankful that I have my sister, we are there for each other. God bless each of you!!
I know what you mean Joan. We are without my beloved children either Thanksgiving or Christmas during the holidays. But we need to share them with in-laws and that is wonderful… but hard! I know!
Such a good message to start every day off with, and a great reminder for starting off the holiday season with.
Thank you so much.
Have a blessed day.
Wow! Well as I lay here and cry at your words reminding us all to be more thoughtful! Loving and kind and to put others first ! I am a very good wife! Mother! Grandmother and daughter to my 94 year old Dad who lives with us on our farm , I have a beautiful life with my husband of 33 years! A new farmhouse! Beautiful 26 acres, horses! My dream, goats,chickens! Dogs and a very special cat who we adore named Gypsy! We have GREAT friends and as I lost Mom to Alztimiera 5 years ago reflecting on all her special quality so as the rock
for all of us! I sometimes find myself caught up in being selfish or having unloving thoughts towards my Dad with frustration at times! And the husband too! Ha, of course! I to have a grown daughter who I haven’t seen for 7 or 8 years now! She has borderline personality mental disorder and it breaks my heart but I cherish her son! My grandson who I adore who is now 20 and doing well who my husband and I raised! In spite of him losing his Mom!My Dad helped us make all this new life we have for the past two years ! I guess I sooooooo need to be reminded of letting go and I try sooo hard to have deep graditute every day and I thank GOD always for all my blessings! We are ALL so lucky to just to have a beautiful home and things surrounding us with beauty! Plenty of food, whatever we want! Sooo many people are living in physical tragedy and. have nothing and it makes me sooo frustrated to think. That I sometimes want my privacy with my husband and feel like I just can’t always just be ! Well ! Sorry for carrying on SO! Thank you soooo much for listening! I will CHERISH the words you relayed of Gods message today and be very grateful!,thanks,Yvonne
God bless you Cindy. You are in my prayers. Thank you for sharing. Listen, we all feel like you do! That is why I wrote this! Hugs!
Thank you for keeping me in your prayers! God Bless you too Yvonne ! I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving and a Blessed Christmas! I really enjoy reading your blog and look forward to Sundays also !
Thank you so much for this. I think I’ll print it out. The scriptures will be great morning devotions, reminding me how to start each day and scriptures to focus on.
I haven’t spent my holidays with my daughter for over 20 years, but God has taught me so much through this time. It’s been hard – especially in the beginning. Each year feels different. I try to focus on what God would have me to know, how to love better, how to reach out to others (in my emptiness, I know others also feel empty and lonely). Looking back, I’ve become a better person and I’ve watched my daughter grow too. We’ve grown separately. Someday I hope we can unite in a way that only God can plan.
Thank you again, Yvonne. You are a blessing.
In the few comments, it was those of us feeling a separation in our family at the time to be joyous. I began feeling a failure and then I was reminded in my Spirit that if Jesus had stayed in that village who did not want Him, the 5000 would not have heard ! These stories are one follows the other. And so though I’m not very good at this, I should spread Jesus message of Salvation wherever I go. And if my family member is acidic in response to me as a person while others do not share that about me, I’m not much of a light with a dour face and not trusting God in all this. It all hurts. Never thought it would be me. I loved Jesus. Didn’t have childhood issues. Had friends galore. I loved carping for my children. But I think I’ve said enough. Thank you.
I look so forward to your Sunday posts-have forwarded some and find that your wisdom and loving words are just what I need. Sometimes you and our minister are on the same page which just strengthens what the message is. Thank you.
Thank You Yvonne! I need to remember these truths each and every day. May your Thanksgiving be blessed by the presence and goodness of God.
Your special words about loving others during the holidays is spot on! And what so many of us need to be reminded of. I know it is more important than the table decor and menu. Without love in our hearts and love toward others, all the other stuff falls flat and feels lousy inside. I’m touched by your readers that are missing children or struggling with selfish thoughts with elders (how honest and true!) I’m still have my young adult children coming home for the holidays, and a mother in law visiting from out of town for 8 days…but it won’t be long till I’m in a harder stage as well. We have so much to learn from each other, and your blog is a nice place to do that. Thank you Yvonne, I appreciate all the hard work you do here to inspire all of us. Happy Thanksgiving!
Bless your sweet heart Carol!
nice …
Thank you so much for these words. I hope that you and yours have a wonderful thanksgiving and Christmas holiday. x
Thank you Yvonne — wise and wonderful Scriptures to remember and practice not only during the holiday season but throughout our lives. Have a terrific Thanksgiving and Blessed Christmas!
I so loved this and NEEDED to hear it. God’s timing!
Always love God’s word and a reminder of how we are supposed to live and treat others!
This is so powerful and filled with God’s inspired words and wisdom! I will need to read this often during this upcoming holiday season! Thanks so much for sharing from your heart!
This is such a great reminder. Hugs and blessings to you.
Happy Thanksgiving, Renae.
Thank you for reminding us and giving us tips of something that is so important! Love it!
Hi Lori, writing this and rereading it was a big reminder to me too. Happy Thanksgiving.
Beautifully written Yvonne. Thank you for the reminders of who we are and who we represent this Thanksgiving season. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family, too
Yvonne, your insight and Bible verses saved me moments ago from hitting Send on a note to a difficult narcissistic sibling whose nonstop bragging exceeds boundaries. I will re-think how to address this, if at all, and will pursue additional prayer. Meantime, I’m grateful for God’s grace and for your honest sharing. Blessings to all in this blog community.
Appreciate this beautiful reminder! Thank you! Blessings to you and your family for a Happy Thanksgiving and a very Merry Christmas.
Thank you, Patti. Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas.